This maybe ‘deviant’ but it was my dream to be a mom and go solo. Oh, I see heads shaking.
Babies and kids have this innocence about them that is very real. Their genuineness makes them my most favorite people. And this makes me want to have one.
I ALWAYS WANTED TO HAVE A CHILD ON MY OWN.
You may be wondering, I know. Questions about abandonment, me being careless and wild, seeking attention, etc tickle your mind. Darling, remember that you always have a choice, judge me or ask me! Oh, I hear you whispering. Good thing I have mastered the art of “dedma”.
I learned all along that I don’t owe anyone any justification and explanation. (So this, I will cut short)
I know too, that bearing and giving birth to this child doesn’t make me a mother.
Now that God gifted me my wish, I am being the best I can. I am loving her the best I know how. And if one day she would not just call me “mom” but her “Mother”, that day marks the best day of my life!
There will be times when I cannot parent her alone…those times I need you most. (SOS) As they say, it takes a village to raise a child. TIA.
As I journey through, these letters will remind me of the love I have for her. I know that there will be bumps, obstacles and unexpected stops along the way but Aia will always be my guide and the very reason why I keep going.